At TopatoCo, we know some of you have certain ideas about how things work. You might think we’re all robots and the things you order go through pneumatic tubes and are placed in packages and shipped by a magical robot. That is not the case. We are prejudiced against robots so we use humans instead, and it is possible that the human who packs and ships your order is sad, hungry, or upset. That’s why we have… holiday ordering deadlines!
Please note that the target arrival date for all these deadlines is December 22 or sooner. For dates that come before December 22, read this and please give us a couple extra days just in case because things start gettin pretty crazy around here right about now. We run a robot-free workplace and people are imprefect.
|U.S.P.S. First-Class Package International Service™ Deadline was November 18||1|
|DEC 1-5: All shipping methods except U.S.P.S. First-Class Package International Service™ are safe. ONLY USE U.S.P.S. First-Class Package International Service™ IF YOU DON’T MIND GETTING YOUR PACKAGE IN JANUARY|
|DEC 6: International orders made not selecting U.S.P.S. Priority Mail Express International™ shipping will likely arrive in January.|
|DEC 11: USPS FIRST CLASS and STANDARD may not make it in time and neither will USPS EXPRESS MAIL INTERNATIONAL.|
|DEC 16: ALMOST NOTHING IS SAFE. USPS EXPRESS is the only safe USPS option. For FEDEX HOME/GROUND shipping refer to this map, otherwise choose Overnight, Two Day, or Three Day accordingly.|
|DEC 20: NOT EVEN SUPER-MUSCLY BABY JESUS WOULD BE ABLE TO PULL THIS ONE OFF|
Thank you for allowing us to serve you for yet another hard-to-explain year. We also have a few more surprises up our sleeves. NOW LET’S GET TO SHIPPING